Shanna Kay

Homeschooling Adventure...

2009-12-29T12:33:00.002-05:00

So our homeschooling adventure has already begun, ever since Barend was born. I think, besides pictures and updates, I'm going to turn this blog into our homeschooling adventure blog :) What we do as a family to help each other learn. It's going to be fun and interesting and I'm looking forward to the great amount of learning we'll be doing over the extent of the rest of our lives.

A couple of pictures...

2009-01-21T14:15:00.004-05:00

Barend wanted me to, "Hand me a wrench mommy! I need to fix the chair." And if I had sound for Juniper...she has thing grunt thing going on. It's between a growl and a grunt. Cute, but she does it alot now :)

"My eggs are raken."

2009-01-16T13:58:00.002-05:00

Barends sentence from today. We were outside the other day and I had the snowshoes on and the next day when I was playing with Barend I told him I had to stop because my legs were aching from walking around in the snow. Today, as Barend was getting down from his chair after lunch, he said, "My eggs are raken." and proceeded to point to his knees and legs. That was the only way that I got it without asking him again. My little guy :)

Here's a picture of me and what my sister in law says as, "Barend with hair!" : ) And one of Barend back in August.

My little girl...

2009-01-12T17:39:00.002-05:00

Is almost pulling herself up to a standing position. She does stand on her own, but she tends to go "timber" unexpectedly. When she's on the floor she tends to stick her butt up in the air alot. She's getting so big.

New arrivals...

2009-01-08T13:17:00.005-05:00

So we got a dining room table :) No more eating on the floor during breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Juniper has got her fifth tooth, so many more to go.

Pictures are: Barend and Dad working on putting together the table and chairs, Barend waiting on the timer so he could play "Uncle Mark's game" (PS2 Star War Legos), Juniper going at great lengths to get cords to chew on, Barend taking a picture of Juniper going to great lengths to chew on cords, and Barend and Juniper being Barend and Juniper. Enjoy!

Snow and stuff...

2008-12-19T16:27:00.002-05:00

So here are a few pictures of the snow that we got last night and this morning. And Barend and Juniper playing :)

Pictures of late..

2008-12-16T20:23:00.002-05:00

Ok, so I only have a couple...we've been sick the past 3wks and just now catching up on things :)
The handprint is Barend's. We were making sugar cookies :) Juniper is eating coco wheats.

Teeth and Thanksgiving...

2008-11-19T22:51:00.003-05:00

Wow, what happened to November? Juniper is getting her two top teeth and hasn't been sleeping. She's actually up right now chewing on a DVD case staring at her dad as he eats ice cream. She likes watching people eat :)

Barend has his first dentist appointment tomorrow. Hopefully it'll go ok. I want to take some pictures, but I'm not sure if they'll allow it in the office. Hmmmm...

I'll be "home" for a week starting this Saturday for Thanksgiving. Hopefully, I'll be able to see family and friends that I haven't seen in awhile.

I'm thankful for all the people that God has put into my life at appointed times to help me along the race that he has called us to run. What a challenge the race has been, but worth every step.

Have a great Thanksgiving!!!

Sick babies....

2008-10-25T18:54:00.001-04:00

Yup...my babies are sick again :( Looks like a week of staying at home...

Pumpkin Carving and Stuff...

2008-10-13T10:06:00.003-04:00

So we got a pumpkin this past weekend that was big enough to carve...Trav did the cutting and Barend looked cute :) After Trav got the top off though, I was sure Barend was going to "dig in" and get messy. He looked inside the pumpkin and wouldn't even put his hand in. He ended up just watching, but he did want to help with the carving part (the part with the knives....). We also saved the seeds and tried our hand at roasting pumpkin seeds. Needless to say, they needed more salt and not be cooked as long as they did....they were still good though :) Here are some pics for your enjoyment.

Heros and Applesauce...

2008-10-08T09:21:00.003-04:00

Teeth and Harmonicas...

2008-10-07T07:54:00.003-04:00

So my daughter has her first tooth at 5months of age. She's been fussy lately and hasn't been sleeping too well and now I know why. Her little sharp tooth (yes, it's very sharp for such a little thing) poked through a couple of days ago. We are now awaiting the one right next to it, which should come any day now. She's also rolling to get to places and when she's patient she'll scoot using her toes.

My mom got barend a harmonica. He loves it and actually plays very well. He doesn't over play so it sounds really nice. Anyway, this is how the harmonica conversation goes:

Barend: "Cry mommy, cry."
Me: (I pretend to cry)
Barend: "What would you like, baby?"
Me: "I want some music."
Barend: "O.K.!" (plays the harmonica)

Two seconds later....

Barend: "Cry mommy, cry."

He's so funny sometimes :)

I have some more pictures, however, my son has confiscated the batteries that were in it for some of his toys, so I'll have to get more at the store next time I'm out :)

Pictures :)

2008-09-16T16:35:00.003-04:00

So my baby boy is now 3yrs old :) He's getting so big and talking so much. He plays by himself alot with his super hero guys and has them converse with each other (he does the voices). Its so cute! Last night he was playing with all the playdough that he got for his birthday and I happened to peek in the dinning room and on the window he had made "his project". As you can see from the picture he put playdough dots all over the window. Silly boy :) Juniper is still waiting for those teeth to arrive, but she's sucking her thumb like a champ and is kinda pushing herself along with her legs when shes rolled over. Won't be long and I'll have to figure out how to split myself in half with Barend going one direction and Juniper the other. We started CBS today and will be doing MOPS too, so we're finally meeting some people around here :) I've gotta go...Juniper is tired of being on her belly. Enjoy the pictures!!

Stuff...

2008-09-03T16:31:00.004-04:00

So, Barend is going to be three very soon (Monday) and he's my little character. We've been to the beach a few times this past week (love being 15min! from Lake Michigan) and Barend's routine is get in the water, roll in the sand like he's taking a bath, then get back in the water....thus repeating even after we get him "rinsed" off when we are about to leave. Today while putting away groceries and cleaning the kitchen I gave barend 7 little chips of baking chocolate and as you can see from the pictures he savoured them by playing with them in a variety of ways putting them through the paper towel roll and "hiding them" and placing them on top of the puffs box, his "tower".

Juniper is sucking her right thumb, following in her brothers footsteps (although he sucks his left thumb) and is almost rolling over. She gets her hips over and just can't get the rest of the way. She's also got one heck of a smile :) Well, enjoy some of the pictures :)

Scrapbooking and picture ideas...

2008-08-29T15:26:00.003-04:00

So I need some new ideas of taking kid pictures and stuff. I got a bunch of scrap books for my birthday and going to do a highschool book, barend and juniper book, family book, Australia book, and a wedding book. Need page ideas :)

Thanks!

Two sick babies...

2008-08-29T08:34:00.001-04:00

Both my munchkins are sick :( Barend is doing the coughing thing now and Juniper has the stuffy nose and sneezing.

At least one of us was smiling this morning...

2008-08-27T15:39:00.002-04:00

Thanks for all the prayers! I was able to take an hour and a half nap with both of them this afternoon....can't believe how much that has helped! Anyway, here's a picture of the only one smiling this morning. The silly girl decided she was going to roll over too and we didn't have the camera handy.

And so it began...

2008-08-27T04:15:00.002-04:00

Forgive my typing, for it is 4:15am and I've been up every 30min or so with a screaming almost 3yr old. He has a cold and refuses to blow his nose and every time he tries to put his thumb in his mouth he can't breath and gets upset. This is from a little guy who just blowed his nose before bed time and had no problem with it at all...hmmmmmm....how do you get them to do it. So I'm extremely frazzled, tired, patience has completely gone out the window, and counting the minutes until morning arrives (oh wait that's already happened!!) so i can put in a movie and not do much today (oh right, i have a 4month old that needs watching too...) Oh, and Trav has a project due on Friday....not much available help in that arena. So all you prayer people out there, and you know who you are, pray for us today and during bed time tomorrow (well actually today) so that Barend will get over this cold and we'll be able to get some sleep!! Oh, and pray that Trav, Juniper, and I don't get sick....especially Juniper.....*sigh*

This is my first experience having a sick child with a 4month old, while cosleeping and breastfeeding...her needing me and my son needing me at the same time.

Sunset at the beach...

2008-08-26T14:23:00.003-04:00

We went to Holland State Park last night and watched the sunset...beautiful :)

More pictures and more fun...

2008-08-25T08:57:00.003-04:00

"I'll stop those waves! I have a life-server on." Barends quote from when we walked out on the pier yesterday at the Holland State Park. We made him wear a life preserver because of the amount of waves and how much they were splashing on the pier. The water was beautiful, unfortunately i couldn't go in, because my daughter wasn't liking the sand blowing in her face too much. There were red flags out (no swimming due to strong undercurrent) but Trav and Barend, Barend just staying on the shore, braved the waters and waves. Barend enjoyed laying down in the sand while the waves pushed him forward further onto the shore, until a couple of them were big enough to get in his face. Poor B was shivering after just a few minutes because the air was cooler than the water.

Barend also wanted to see the lighthouse and since it was on the other side of the lake (Lake Macatawa) we drove around to the south side of Holland and went through a private gate thing to walk up to the lighthouse. Barend enjoyed the walk and the lighthouse, but it was starting to get late and colder. I had Juniper wrapped in a blanket and was holding her and Barend was on his dads shoulders. Trav turned and asked me if i was doing ok holding juniper, i told him yes and that was the last time trav asked...barend on the other hand asked it about 20 times, "how you doin back there mama?!?" My little boy :) Here are some pictures during last week and stuff...don't have any of the beach, cause both of us were too lazy to take any.

"Where's Barend?"

2008-08-20T14:54:00.001-04:00

Few more pictures...

2008-08-14T16:28:00.002-04:00

Barends favourite phrases, "What happened?" and "Why?" for instance we made "keenie" bread the other day and he got into the cinnamon and got it all over his shirt...he looks at his shirt and says, "what happened?" i explain to him and he then proceeds to ask why...silly goose :)

Aftermath...

2008-08-02T09:59:00.003-04:00

He couldnt wait....he also decided he was going to have two and try to hide the evidence of his first one behind the bench :)

The Cupcake and The Tea...

2008-08-01T17:24:00.004-04:00

So we made cupcakes today and Barend wanted one soooo bad. I told him he couldn't eat it until we had dinner. This was 4pm it is now almost 5:30pm and he still hasn't eaten it, but has insisted that it was his cupcake and he was going to hold onto it. Wow! Can't believe he's lasted this long without taking a bite :)

The other picture is a picture of him with the sun tea that Trav made. Barend wanted a picture with the tea :) Don't ask me why.

Struggling...

2008-07-29T08:52:00.000-04:00

It's been a tough few weeks emotionally. Pray for me!

Making Cookies...

2008-07-25T15:03:00.001-04:00

Yup...more pictures

2008-07-24T14:12:00.002-04:00

What do you see?

2008-07-24T14:10:00.001-04:00

Daily picture post :)

2008-07-16T15:57:00.003-04:00

Daily picture post :)

2008-07-15T16:21:00.002-04:00

More Pictures...

2008-07-14T13:08:00.003-04:00

We're Home...

2008-07-01T15:31:00.002-04:00

It's a strange feeling to be back at my parents house. It's changed so much, but every time I step in the door and smell the air all the memories (or actually most of them) come flooding back.

My mom, with my brother and niece, came to Holland to pick up Barend, Juniper, and I and take us back to Freeland for the week. It was Juniper's first "long" car ride, something more then 40min. It took us just about 3hrs and it went relatively well. When we got into town we saw my grandpa and some of my relatives at Fire Mountain. It was Juniper's first time meeting her great grandpa.

It's going to be a busy week making stops here and there and catching up with family and friends that I haven't seen in awhile. And now that I know how to transfer pictures from our camera to the computer and post them, I'll be doing that :)

Have a happy 4th of July!!

Another Picture...

2008-06-30T12:27:00.001-04:00

"I can do that...."

2008-06-22T17:54:00.001-04:00

Trav, Barend, and I were watching 10m platform diving today and Barend comes out and says "I can do that at Grandma Sopcak's house." Wouldn't that be cool! : )

Some pictures...

2008-06-17T09:23:00.003-04:00

What's Happening...

2008-06-04T15:38:00.002-04:00

Trav got a job!! Yeah!! We're moving to Holland, MI this Saturday. So we've been busy packing and taking care of a 2.5yr old and a 4wk old as well as trying to find a place to live.

Thanks to everyone that have been praying for our family!

Juniper has grown so much already. She has her nights and days mixed up, but I know that at some time by God's grace that'll change. Barend loves his sister, always wanting to hold her and kiss her and have her "play" with toys. He's getting big too. Talking in full sentences and asking "why?" all the time. When he's upset he crosses his arms and looks away and kinda puckers his lips. Hard not to laugh when he does that. Still loves it outdoors and it'll be hard to leave my in-laws. They have been so good to us.

Well anyway, gotta go do more packing. I'll be posting more pictures once we get hooked up at our new place with high speed internet : )

Picture...

2008-05-06T12:43:00.004-04:00

OK so far I have one picture on the computer of Juniper. She looks so much like her brother when he was born.

Announcing...

2008-05-05T08:11:00.002-04:00

Our little bundle of joy has arrived :)

Juniper Lily Ammeline December Brack (we just liked them all)
7lbs 2oz - 19 1/2 inches long
born at 11:47am on May 3, 2008 at home in the water

I'll post some pictures when I get them and our story when I get another minute :)

I've Forgotten...

2008-04-04T21:27:00.003-04:00

What I look like not pregnant. 6wks away from the arrival of our second little one and I have to say I'm much bigger than what I was with Barend. Sleeping isn't relaxing...I have to shift positions every couple hours so my hips can have a break. Getting up off the floor....a challenge. Carrying Barend uphill when he begs, "hold you!!"...also a challenge.

Getting excited to see the little one.

Barend is 2.5yrs old now. He's talking up a storm, riding his tricycle, still playing with tools and digging in the dirt, loves to chase the chickens like Grandpa, and play "waterfall" with daddy.

Picture of Barend with his Aunt Shara and Uncle Chad and cousins Elizabeth, Natalie, and Adalia.

News...

2007-09-27T17:59:00.000-04:00

So...much has happened since the last time I wrote.

Barend has turned two : ) Adorable as ever. He has his own tool set now and goes around "fixing" the house.

Our house has a sale pending on it. We should be closing any day now, just waiting for the buyers to establish home owners insurance. Big Blessing!!

And....we'll be expecting our next little one sometime mid May. Surprise, for us too : )

Thanks to everyone who's been praying about the house!!!

Names...

2007-06-27T13:49:00.000-04:00

Barend called me "Shaaaa.....naaa..." this morning. So weird to hear my name from Barend instead of mama.

Gardening...

2007-06-23T21:55:00.000-04:00

Barend has been enjoying life here in the middle of nowhere. Today, we were weeding the garden and while I was trying to explain the difference between a weed and a plant to him, he was trying to "plant" me by continually putting dirt on my back. My little helper : )

Apple...

2007-06-16T17:02:00.000-04:00

which has nothing to do with my post, but Barend (my son) just came up to me and said Apple and took the apple core that I had sitting on the computer desk and went to join his dad, sitting on his lap watching him play video games and laughing at all the little people on the TV screen.

It's been awhile for posts with much substance...so much has happened these past few months that's its really hard to put it all into words.

Please pray for some friends of mine as well as my family! Two friends of mine, they lost their babies one at 6months of pregnancy and the other at 7, and then another one of my friends mother in law has stage 4 brain cancer and then my aunt has stage 4 bone cancer. Yuck!!

We're still in Kazoo and our house is still unsold in Lansing. We've lowered the price to 102,900 (so any takers??). I'm not sure what to think of it...feeling somewhat torn between two places, unable to settle. I've got friends that I miss greatly in Lansing....and family here (Kazoo) that I would miss if we left. I know my mom would prefer us in Lansing (easier drive for her). I just wish God would write our story in a book. Tell us where we need to be, when, and how, so all this back and forth stuff would end.

Barends been on a decent schedule when his teeth aren't bothering him. He sleeps for three hours straight, wakes up, nurses for a minute, and goes back to sleep. The cycle repeats until 8 or 9am when he decides its time to wake up for the day. It's been a blessing knowing that Trav and I have some alone time after we put munchkin down. He's extremely active. Following his grandpa everywhere and mimics what he does. "Hammers" nails into the wood using sticks or rocks, of which he has a great assortment as he walks into the house ; ) Wants to constantly ride the tractor, be outside in the dirt (rolling around in it), help grandma "weed" the flower beds pulling up some of the flowers (hasn't learned the distinction between them yet). Basically, whatever you are doing whether it be washing the dishes, cooking, yard work, he wants to help.

Favorite words: rock, stick, poopoo, tractor, dirt, berries, eggs, toast, book, daaadeee, mama, cole (uncle Cole, Travs brother), grandma (both used for Travs parents), juice, fries, cook, bath, gosh (Trav taught him that one), horse, house, truck, car...just to name a few. His run is like a scamper....adorable...a must see. Growing very tall...he's outgrown some of his 18month stuff and into his 2yr clothes (can it really be?) He has similar personality characteristics that match mine when he's tired. He'll get all happy, giggly, and then he gets kinda weird....then starts headbutting, biting (gets frustrated at things easier). So if I don't get him down soon enough, watch out! He's just changing so fast...still cute as ever : )

My sister in laws are both expecting! Emily (Coles wife) is due in October with their third and LaShara (Trav and Coles sister) is due in November with their first. Very excited...Sharas pregnancy is a major answer in prayer. They have been trying for 1.5yrs. Two more babies...added to the few others that I know that are on their way (Nicole in December, my cousin Nicole due in August)

Me, well, I'm still enjoying being a stay at home mom, although I miss the work that I did with MDOT and the people there. I also really miss Lansing every time we go back to check on the house....it's really hard, cause I love being able to take Barend outside on my inlaws 10acre yard and let him roam and discover, without fear of cars and traffic...I enjoy the noises around here, the frogs, birds, whereas you hear the noise of sirens and boom boxes outside our living room window in Lansing...Here I can take Barend up to see his grandparents most anytime.....but I miss our family in Lansing...friendships that have been developed since we moved there back when Trav and I attended MSU.

Faith that God has us in this present position for a purpose and that he will provide understanding and contentment with what he's given us and Hope that he will continue to help us grow and learn in love and compassion for each other and others.

So, Barend has placed the somewhat eaten apple core back on the desk and is currently laughing his head off at a toy bird house that his dad is making a bird pop out of....i guess i should get going!

Jammin...

2007-02-13T13:49:00.000-05:00

Trav got me an iPod for Christmas and Barend has already claimed it for himself : )

Christmas Wish...

2006-12-20T09:20:00.000-05:00

I wish that Barend would sleep through the night, or at least sleep 4hrs before he wakes up again.

Update...

2006-11-30T13:12:00.000-05:00

Barend took his first steps two days ago. He took about five toward me. Just adorable. He hasn't done it again since, but every now and again you'll see him let go of the wall, a chair, or whatever he's holding to stabalize himself and take a small step forward to the next object of his attention. Still working on getting more teeth...not too fun, but he's still adorable.

Kazoo is beautiful, but sometimes lonely. We're here now, mostly moved in to our cozy little apartment downstairs of Travs parents house. We've been back to Lansing a few times to get Christmas decorations and a few odds n ends that we forgot. Oh, and to get the house "cleaned" for a showing we had yesterday. Not even going to say how it went, because I never know. Only God really knows when we're going to sell, however frustrating that may be. The snow may become an issue, due to the steepness of the driveways. I'll have to take some pictures : ) We are only a minute away from a ski slope, so if you want to come and visit we'll have to go skiing if we can get out of the drive.

I don't get a chance to get on the computer anymore. We have dial up now (no cable out here) and only one phone line, so I don't like tying it up more than I have to. My cell phone doesn't work out here unless I go outside and stand in one place or I drive closer to the expressway. You can call it and leave a message. I check them periodically.

Miss you back in Lansing! Thanks to Nicole and Chaz for checking up on the house now and again and getting our mail : )

Gotta go....got some other stuff to do before kiddo wakes up : )

Come and visit sometime!!

Discouragement...

2006-11-13T12:12:00.000-05:00

Have you ever been so discouraged by something that it totally drags you down? We're still waiting on selling our house. It seems that were only getting one showing a month. My inlaws on the other hand just listed their house in Freeland 3 wks ago and they have an offer already. It's cool that they are on the verge of moving, but at the same time I'm jealous. They've offered us a place in their house, but the fear of imposing is there.

Although, it seems that I shouldn't be complaining. There are others like us, trying to sell their house and many on the market much longer than we have been. I guess what I'm asking for is prayer that God would ease my impatient heart. That he would provide the right buyer and that he would provide Trav and I a nudge in the right direction.

They made it...

2006-10-15T22:26:00.000-04:00

Tigers are going to the World Series!!! Awesome : )

Change...

2006-09-12T17:41:00.000-04:00

I can't believe it's been a month since I left my job. We (Trav, Barend, and I) are still in the process of transitioning. For the past 3wks, I've been able to sleep when Barend sleeps and that's made all the difference. He's on a late night schedule (going to bed at 11:30pm), which I don't really mind too much, but getting up at 10:30am is sometimes frustrating, but I'm not complaining : ) He only woke up once (for the 1st time since he was born) during the night last night. I couldn't believe it : )

Since I've been home with him time doesn't really exist. It's gone by so fast and the days just blend in together.

He is also a year old now. We had a party for him on Saturday which turned out to be a blast : ) Barend didn't "dig in" to his birthday cake as much as I thought he would. He, very meticulously, picked off one of the mini oreo cookies I had used as the froggie's eye and proceeded to eat it. He then went after the other mini oreo and just when I thought he lost interest in the cake, he dragged his fingers across it and got a handful of frosting. Just too cute! He also didn't really take an interest in opening presents, although later the next day when I wanted to put away all the gift bags and tissue paper, he suddenly wanted to explore and find out what was inside them. Barend wanted me to say thanks to everyone who came and for the presents : )

Not walking yet, but getting there. Standing up next to everything and a couple nights ago he was in the middle of the room and stood up on his legs with his hands on the floor. I thought he was going to do it right then, but those silly socks that I put on his feet to keep them warm made him slip and slide and when I went to take them off of him, he lost interest and started playing with his toys.

I'll post some pictures, once I figure out how to download my camera : ) Gotta go!

Last Day...

2006-08-11T10:49:00.000-04:00

So today is my last day at work and somehow it seems that I should be really excited and happy, but truth is I'm not.

I've always enjoyed doing what I do, being a road designer (Civil Engineer) for MDOT. But the pull of not having to get up at 6:30am every morning after getting maybe 6 hours of interrupted sleep, not having to sit in an freezer of a bathroom and pump two times a day hoping that I get enough milk for Barend to drink that next day, not feeling badly at work that my mind is elsewhere (home with my husband and baby), and not constantly feeling that I'm hard to work with because of my pumping schedule and not wanting to work so much overtime, is too great.

But the person that I love the most....the person that I'm able to say anything to and know that he'll be there for me (even though there are times that I hurt him sooo very much)...the person that I really can't live without...isn't happy. How can I be happy knowing that I'm taking an opportunity away from him, doing something that is looked upon as uncommon, but something that makes him soo happy??

Yeah, I'm looking forward to being home with Barend, being able to sleep when he sleeps, being able to clean and enjoy cleaning (sounds weird I know, but I've always enjoyed cleaning), preparing meals for Trav, not having to pump, and going to parks and museums. But I'm not looking forward to trying to sell our house, Trav commuting, moving, and establishing new relationships with people when I'm not such a good communicator.

Struggles of a working mom, soon to be stay at home mom, trying to balance lifes needs, wants and dreams.

Help...

2006-08-02T09:35:00.000-04:00

My in laws came down yesterday to help get the house ready to sell. We got so much done it was incredible. I almost cried this morning going downstairs in the basement, because it was clean. I could see the carpet. Things were organized in boxes. Laundry done and folded. Floors swept. Amazing!

We even brought down the king sized matress from the 2nd floor, a feat in itself.

Thank you guys!!! Love you lots!

Oh, I forgot to mention that our house is 1,100 sft (not including 750 sft in the basement).

Times a Changing....

2006-08-01T09:34:00.000-04:00

Yeah, so the rollercoaster that I've been on the past week or so has finally slowed. I don't think it's finished yet, but who knows really.

I can talk about this now because our parents know and my boss knows.

Trav, Barend, and I are moving to Kalamazoo. Travis got a job working with his brother at a computer software company. We're switching rolls. I'll be staying at home with Barend and Trav will be working.

You know you can say so many things all eloquently in your head, but then you try to type them and you just come up short. Yeah, so it sucks leaving friends and a familiar area..........but it's exciting to do something new.

If anyone is looking to buy a home, we're selling ours.
3 bedroom, 1.5 bath, Cape Cod with full basement
Lot size 66' x 280', 6' x 8' shed in backyard
two houses down from a park
Big garden in full bloom
Great neighbors
If your interested, comment below and I'll send you more info : )

More to come soon....oh here is a picture of my silly 'ol bear

Rollercoaster...

2006-07-27T11:41:00.000-04:00

Yes, a rollercoaster, one that is exciting to the point where you bite off all your finger nails in anticipation and also one that is sickening...so many ups and downs and side to sides once you're off the ride you're not sure where your stomach landed.

That's how my life is going right now. One gigantic rollercoaster. I'm not enjoying it.

Sometimes I just wish God would say...this is where you need to be at this point in your life, this is how things should look. Then I can make the necessary decisions to match what the picture is supposed to look like, like the old color by numbers that I did when I was little. Unfortunately, I remember not really following the numbers and wanting it to look my way instead of what the instructions called for. I still wish for some direction....especially when you love someone soooo very much and they desire their lifes picture to be something different then your own. How do you resolve this?!?!?

Yes, I've been praying and so has he and so has a few other people, but how do you know which way to go???

Just sad....just really really sad.....

Commenting...

2006-07-25T11:49:00.000-04:00

So I was wondering why I wasn't getting any comments....especially on the pictures of the cutest baby : ) Holly pointed out that I had it set to members only commenting. I changed it to anyone, so feel free to write a note.

Swimming...

2006-07-21T07:51:00.000-04:00

Here's my little guy, enjoying his cousin's pool.

Side note: He has 5 teeth!

Trippy....

2006-07-11T12:06:00.000-04:00

Just read this in the Lansing State Journal...

"Just after 12:30 a.m. Sunday, a 2001 Chevrolet Cavalier driven by Kevin Mallory, 38, of Owosso was heading east in the westbound lanes of Interstate 69 near Upton Road, Clinton County sheriff's officials said. Mallory's car struck a westbound Chrysler Pacifica driven by Shanna Clark, 28, of Chicago; both drivers died instantly.

A backseat passenger in the westbound car, Travis Clark, 26, of Chicago, also was pronounced dead at the scene. A third passenger, Kerry Putnam, 25, of Chicago, was taken to Sparrow Hospital, where she remained in serious condition Monday." Article Link to LSJ

Notice the names and ages.......only a year older than Trav and I. The driver traveling the wrong way struck their vehicle going 60-70mph. Crazy!

American Citizenship...

2006-06-27T11:15:00.000-04:00

Do you pass??? Take the quiz

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13442226/

Broccoli....

2006-06-26T19:50:00.000-04:00

Mmmmm...

Avocados...

2006-06-26T10:09:00.000-04:00

Mmmmmm....

STOP THE PRESSES...

2006-06-21T14:36:00.000-04:00

So Barend has a tooth. One. He is also standing, with the help of various objects around the house; cardboard boxes, subwoofer, TV Entertainment Center, pillows (don't really know how he accomplishes this one), bathtub, stool, etc.

He still loves the cat. I don't think Theo minds the attention so much, cause whenever Barend grabs a fist full of hair, Theo doesn't move. Just lays there. Rolls on his back. We try to push him to move, so he'll get up trod a foot and plop right back down again, within Barend's reach of course. And the process repeats.

Stuff and Not Much Else...

2006-05-25T14:37:00.000-04:00

Barend is closing in on his 9month bday. No teeth, not that I'm complaining. My nephew has 6 teeth, being 4 days younger than Barend and my niece has 8 (the last I heard) being 1 month older than Barend. Both moms have been bitten, and not very gently. So I really don't mind, other than his very runny nose and crankiness.

He's doing the army crawl at speeds that recruits would be jealous of. He's so fast in fact that when you pull him across the room AWAY from the entertainment center that is surrounded by a barricade of pillows, and you go about your buisness trying to catch up on some housework, he's back at the entertainment center, on top of the pillows trying to check out what we try to keep hidden. He's like that though, wanting to play with anything other than his "kids" toys. If we try and give him his "kid" cup to distract him while we take a drink out of our "adult" glass, he wants the glass and not his cup. Maybe, Trav and I will have to start eating and drinking using all his baby sized stuff, so he'll start getting interested in those.

He's beginning to realize that grass is his friend, not a green matt full of little needle sharp like fingers reaching out and trying to take his hand off. Although, the next step would be to teach him that it's not really good to eat ones friend.

He's a thumb sucker and has a tag blanket that Trav and I have to make sure is available for his daytime naps and at bedtime. I just hope he doesn't end up like me, in the thumb sucking buisness. I sucked my thumb till I was about 13yrs old to my parents detriment (spending roughly $3000 for braces) and had a "binki" (blanket) till just a few years ago. I still regret throwing those away.

He's growing out of all his 6-9 month stuff. We've been dressing him in 12month stuff since his 7 month bday, due to the height that he gets from his dad. And the fact that the waste on alot of the younger month clothes doesn't fit around his cloth diapers. Oh well, he looks too cute with oversized clothes on.

Sleep, is still something that we're searching for and can't really seem to find. Trav has been somewhat successful in getting him into a naptime routine during the day. We know that if he doesn't get at least 3.5 hours of daytime napping in, where in for a long night. Even longer than the usual no sleep nights. He gets up just about every 1.5 - 2 hours. Sometimes I'm lucky and he'll have a stretch of 3hrs, too bad those are at the very earliest of times when I have to get up and get ready for work. I can't blame it all on the fact that it's him that's not sleeping. I think I have some part of the blame. I'm a mover when I sleep (to the annoyance of Travis and that's why we purchased a king sized bed) and I think when I move it wakes up Barend. Well, I think Barend will move and then wake himself up, cause he hasn't really learned how to go back to sleep on his own. I keep trying to tell myself...."and this too shall pass." Just a life phase, something that you don't want to rush, but you can't wait until it's over.

Trav's garden is coming around. It's going to be great : ) I'll have to post a list of what he's growing. He's also making wine, and getting ready to try his hand at beer. We'll see. Too bad we won't be able to try the wine until next year. Oh, he's 25yrs old now. His bday was on the 14th. His siblings informed him that it's a great number, because now he can rent a car in any state and our car insurance goes down : )

I should get back to work................

Pictures!

2006-05-05T12:47:00.000-04:00

So, my sister in law pointed me in the right direction on how to post pictures....

It's crazy how fast time flys...

Big Barend!

2006-04-07T08:18:00.000-04:00

So he's officially said dadadada and mamama. He said mama first about a week ago and just last night we were playing with him upstairs and Trav was trying to get him to say dada. Sure enough, "dadadadadada" came out. I don't think he really knows what it means yet, but we're working on that part. He also got his knees underneath him for the first time and instead of using his arms for support, he leaned forward and used his head to stabalize himself.

Just in the past week he's also discovered his shadow. He will get really still when you hold him up so he can stand and then flap his arms really fast and dance and then just smile : ) Then he'll get really still and repeat the process. Cute!

He loves mirrors. Loves remote controls. Loves alarm clocks.

Our baby is getting soooo big : ) 7 months old...

I found it!!

2006-03-15T13:43:00.000-05:00

Yes, I've located the pot of gold! Frozen gold to be exact. And I actually have to give credit to my brother, cause he's the one who really found it.

Everyone knows that Superman is the best ice cream flavor. It's taken me 26yrs, ok so really like 15yrs, of tasting store boughten ice cream to find just the right brand to match the ice cream that I absolutely love from my hometown city dairy.

Shall I disclose this information to you? Since I'm nice I will : ) It's a Premium Mooney's brand that's called Super Rainbow. Yummy!

Prayer

2006-03-10T12:03:00.000-05:00

I'm submitting an appeal to the insurance company for them to pay the fee that was charged to us when Barend was born. Need prayer that they'll cover it. A new law was passed effective March 2005, so hopefully that'll persude them to cover it.

Also, Barend has been very fussy the past week. I'm attributing it to teething, but he's not really eating and has just been very needing of both Trav and I. I'm just getting tired out.......

Random Thoughts

2006-02-14T12:29:00.000-05:00

It's amazing how time goes by so fast, but yet so slow.

Barend will be 6 months in a couple of days. He's rolling over (both ways), sucking his thumb, and reaching out for anything that he finds interesting, which is pretty much everything. The teeth haven't come yet, but the drool and the fussiness has. The thumb sucking is soooo adorable and it's like he wants everything in his mouth at the same time, thumb (check) blanket (check), cup (check)....hmmm....can I fit a teething ring too?

Sleep?? Hmmm, good question. Seen it anywhere? Tell it I'm looking for it.

We're getting ready for the spring. Trav's been researching doing a garden. It's exciting!! I even paced out our backyard for him and the various "obsticals" that would effect the placement of the garden.

Work....is work. I love my job, it's just I want to be a mom more.

I got a chance to go see Freeland (my old High School) compete at Haslett High School for the gymnastics Regionals. It brought back so many memories and some regrets.

PB and J, time for lunch.

Hope

2006-01-24T09:38:00.000-05:00

My cousin's son, Dustin, passed away yesterday. He was struck by an SUV while riding his bike on the way to school. He was only 14. You begin to question God and his awesome power. Is he so loving?

I want to know if I'll see Dustin again. I want to know if Barend leaves, will I see him again. Where is the line? When is it that God says we are able to make the decision to follow him? At what point do we become "responsible" for our own salvation. Is there really a place...is there really a hope that God has a place for us and his children. I begin to question, if I died in one second, will I see God? Will I be "safe"? And is that even right to think that way?

In the back of my mind, I know that I shouldn't worry. I know I should rely on God. I know it's not for us to decide. But how can we not???

For now they saw something not only behind the wave but behind the sun. They could not have seen even the sun if their eyes had not been strengthened by the water of the Last Sea. But now they could look at the rising sun and see it clearly and see things beyond it. What they saw --eastward, beyond the sun--was a range of mountains. It was so high that either they never saw the top of it or they forgot it. None of them remembers seeing any sky in that direction. And the mountains must really have been outside the world. For any mountains even a quarter of a twentieth of that height ought to have had ice and snow on them. But these were warm and green and full of forests and waterfalls however high you looked. And suddenly there came a breeze from the east, tossing the top of the wave into foamy shapes and ruffling the smooth water all round them. It lasted only a second or so but what it brought them in that second none of those three children will ever forget. It brought both a smell and a sound, a musical sound. Edmund and Eustace would never talk about it afterwards. Lucy could only say, 'It would break your heart.'
'Why,' said I, 'was it so sad?' 'Sad! No,' said Lucy. No one in that boat doubted that they were seeing beyond the end of the world into Aslan's country. (C.S. Lewis, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, pg212)

I cry when I read this section in the book, just about every time. I imagine greeting God at the beginning of this vast space. No more pain, suffering. No more worrying about death, about the emptyness that takes ahold sometimes.

C.S. Lewis and even Tolkein describes their image of heaven to the point where I get shivers and I feel like I shouldn't doubt. I really shouldn't doubt him. I may not understand why. I guess I should be glad that it's something in his control and that no matter what, he is still there for us. So many questions.......

Lord, please wrap your arms around Chad, Stacey, Ashley, Darren, and little Chad. Comfort them. Love them. Give them a hope and a peace in you beyond all understanding. Help us to know how to help them. Please be with all the extended family give all of us hope and faith, that you are in control of all things and no matter how hard things are, you're still there. Amen

A Happy New Year!

2005-12-31T21:07:00.000-05:00

So I'm a couple hours early, but since we're at home not doing anything other than trying to console a very fussy baby, I figured I might as well say HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!

The baby is getting two nice teeth in his bottom gums and has a little cold due to the sickness that was going around my inlaws house during our Christmas trip home. So we're cuddled in our house, Trav is setting up our Ikea stuff we bought back in November and I'm trying to feed the fussy baby.....gotta go...back at it.

A Christmas Card to you...

2005-12-22T10:25:00.000-05:00

Since I'm not great at sending out cards on time; birthdays, anniversaries, get well, or Christmas. I've decided to just make one here.

To those that are very dear to our hearts:

The words from a very famous person who is slightly green, "Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas....perhaps...means a little bit more!" He being the Grinch and how he tried to steel Christmas.

Remember to love, in all the buisiness of the buying, wrapping, driving, and packing.

Merry Christmas!!!

Hugs : )

You Know When It's Time to Relax When.....

2005-12-15T12:08:00.000-05:00

You get stuck in your driveway and it only has 1 1/2" of snow on it.

Problem:
1. Ford Ranger, rear wheel drive loaded with 300lbs of sand in the back.
2. Ice build up on the driveway where the wheel paths are.
3. A truck that doesn't like to "go" when it's cold outside.
3. Lack of sleep.
4. A very emotional mother, who couldn't comfort her child this morning due to teething.

Yes, I got stuck in our driveway this morning when trying to go to work. Barend was upset this morning and wasn't eating. Trav had to work at the coop and he takes Barend with him, so I didn't want Barend to be really upset while Travis was driving. That can unnerve anyone. I gave up trying to feed him and handed him off to Trav hungry.

So Trav leaves and I leave maybe 1 minute after he does. Get in the truck put it in reverse. It stalls. Put it in park. Start it. Put it in reverse. It stalls again. It does this one more time. (this generally happens about 50% of the time when I drive it) Needless to stay I get it moving and then there is no traction. I gas it slightly thinking that it's just a little spot that I'm slipping on. It spins and the rear right tire goes off the driveway. Try to pull it forward and then back, but to no avail. Being the super smart engineer that I am, I try to pull forward and make a three point turn at the front of our drive. Too bad our driveway is too small for this type of maneuver. I ended up off the driveway even further and in a snow bank. The snow bank was from our neighbor who was really nice and plowed our driveway. Too bad the pile was right where the truck ended up.

I called into work.

My boss and a fellow employee come and rescue me from my driveway. Thanks Larry and Jeremiah.

I'm finally to the point where I can say, "I'm relaxed."

Oh, did I mention today is our anniversary (5yrs Travis and I have been married). Happy Anniversary Honey!!

A Laugh

2005-12-12T11:38:00.000-05:00

Barend laughed for the first time on Saturday. At first I thought that it was only hiccups, but he did it a few times in between them. I was putting him in his cool sling that his dad made. I usually just bounce/jingle him to get him lower in the sling and he generally dosen't like the method I choose. So, I decided to do it this time with some added noises.

"Chuga, chuga. Choo choo. Choo choo." With a little shake of my hips on the chuga part and a little up and down motion on the choo choo parts.

He smiled really big and started to giggle.

I went and told Trav and he told me, "It's probably just because he has the hiccups." And when I did the chugas and choo choos again, Barend laughed. And Trav and I just kept laughing with him.

Whether it was that he was laughing at how weird I was being or that he really enjoyed the chugas and choo choos, I will never know. But, it's a nice change to the fussiness that has taken over his mood lately.

He's getting teeth.....yes he's only three months old, but he's drooling, chewing on his fingers, and has a few little white bumps on designated areas where teeth will one day show up.

He's growing up....Trav and I packed away his newborn outfits and some 0-3month clothes this past weekend. Time goes by so fast.

Bitter Sweet

2005-11-18T09:41:00.000-05:00

I'm back to work.

It's been a little rough, particullary in the mornings when I have to say goodbye. I see Travis with his arm around Barend snuggling with him and I just want to stay home, get back in bed, and snuggle too. It's hard, because I'm afraid that one day while I'm at work he'll want me and I won't be able to get to him fast enough and so he won't want me anymore.

But, once I'm at work I'm ok. At least I think I am. I get into a groove; work, pump, work, and pump some more. It actually makes the day go by pretty fast. It becomes hard again during those pumping times when I need to focus on the baby and all I have are pictures. But, I really enjoy what I do. I enjoy designing a project and see it being built. It's just fun! But I miss being with Trav and Barend.

Mr. Magoo, Yoda, and Elmer Fudd Part II

2005-10-05T15:46:00.000-04:00

Part II

Trav unpacked the car while I walked around the birth center and got comfortable sitting and shifting my hips on a big birthing ball.

Side Note: Throughout my pregnancy I had been doing HypnoBabies. It's a selfhypnosis course that prepares you and helps you focus and relax for when the baby comes. We ordered the 6 CD self taught course online and I started it at the 26th wk of my pregnancy. I gotta say it totally helped me stay positive while I was pregnant. The course teaches you to enter hypnosis during your pressure waves and generate anesthesia so that you can remain totally relaxed.

Trav kept encouraging me to enter hypnosis, but I couldn't seem to focus. The contractions were getting more intense and closer together. There was a special Hypnobabies CD that I was supposed to listen to during the the active labor portion, but whenever I tried putting the headphones in my ears I would pull them out two seconds later from me moving around on the birthing ball.

There was a point in time that I told Trav that I didn't think I could do it. I didn't think I could make it through and I was beginning to see why so many women elected to have an epidural. Trav looked into my eyes and said that I could do it, that I was doing it right at that instant. The baby was coming he told me. I refocused and during the next contraction I told myself outloud "baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby." I can't tell you how many times I said it, but it helped to get through that one contraction.

The later the time went out the more vocal I became. So vocal in fact, that there were no longer words that came from my mouth, just yells. I'll call them yells, because that sounds less deseperate than screams (even though some of them could be classified as screams).

12:30am
There was one contraction in particular that I remember that I began to push. I grunted and bared down as hard as I could. One of the midwives (I believe it was Clarice) came in the room and said "That sounded like you were pushing." I confirmed that indeed I was and asked if that was ok.

Myself: "Baby's here."

She checked me and I was 9cm dialated.

They started to fill the big whirlpool tub.

I entered the tub when it was half way full. Trying to get into a squating position and not having much luck because there wasn't enough water to help me support my body, I elected the knees and shins position.

Myself: "I feel like my butt is going to fall off."
Clarice: "Shanna, I haven't lost a butt yet."

The head came.

Push.

Then the shoulders.

I couldn't see and neither could Trav because of how I was positioned.

12:52am
The rest came out.

I layed back in the water waiting for my baby. I was totally relaxed. Knowing it was a boy, before anyone told me. Just had that feeling I guess.

The tub was finally full.

It's a boy!

Just totally relaxed and enjoying every moment.

I pushed the placenta out and Trav cut the cord. Tiny little cord.

Barend Mayer Brack was born on September 8th, 2005 weighing a big 5lb 14oz.
19inches long with blonde/brown hair and deep blue eyes looking just like Mr. Magoo with his hat just barely over his eyes and his forhead wrinkled, just like Yoda with his lips tensed in just a certain way, and just like Elmer Fudd with his eyes wide and his round cheeks.

Thanks to everyone for all your support, meals, and prayers throughout the pregnancy and after. You've all been such an amazing help! Love You!

Mr. Magoo, Yoda, and Elmer Fudd Part I

2005-10-05T15:12:00.000-04:00

PART I

I couldn't sleep at 4am. They were coming every 10 minutes apart and were intense enough that whatever position that I was in wasn't a help. I woke Trav up and told him if they were still going at 7am, I wasn't going to work. They were still going.

I called in, "Not coming in today."

I kept thinking "today's the day". Well....they stopped being intense around 9am. With my hopes dashed I went into work in the afternoon facing everyone and their "you're still pregnant!" and "what, no baby?" comments. During the 2:30pm break I took a walk with my fellow co workers. The contractions were still there and still regular, but I could still function through them. Not yet.

3:50pm
I started timing them, not that this helped make labor happen during any other time that I was having regular contractions in the previous weeks. Needless to say, they started getting closer and I was feeling them getting stronger.

4:45pm
I'm home. I continued to time them for another 3 hours. I didn't want them to go away. Trav asked if today was the day. "I don't know?!?" I didn't want to say yes for fear of being disappointed again.

8:30pm
Called Clarice (our midwife) and told her I thought that I was in labor. She said to meet her at the birth center at 9:30pm (She was actually already there teaching one of the many birthing classes.)

10pm
We arrived at the birth center a little late due to getting through construction and packing the car with the goodies we had prepared for our stay at the birth center. Clarice checked me and I was 2 cm dialated. "You're in early labor." Yes, no turning back. This is it!

We were given a couple options. Stay and get comfortable at the birth center or go home and go through the early labor there. I decided that I wanted to labor at home.

Clarice was going to nap at the birth center instead of going home. She provided us with the phone number for the phone in one of the birthing rooms.

Figuring we would have time to charge some batteries at home, Trav decided to go to the Okemos Meijer and pick up some up and as well as some juice cause he was thirsty. I decided to wait in the car. 30 min later Trav returned to the car carrying his purchase. "I couldn't find the batteries." By this time the contractions were getting pretty intense and I was ready to return to the birth center. We informed Clarice that we were heading back.

11pm
Clarice checked me again and I was at 3cm. Cool I thought to myself. I'm dialating 1 cm an hour so by 9am we'll have this baby.

I can't tell you how fast time flew by after that point.

Relaxation...

2005-09-01T14:25:00.000-04:00

So I think I'm going to have to wait to have the baby until after September 6th.

I have a free one hour massage....can't miss out on that!!

Maybe....

Virtues

2005-08-29T20:47:00.000-04:00

Patience is a virtue that I seem to be lacking in. I have recognized that through this pregnancy it's something that I need to really work on and change about myself.

For me, I've lived my life by one big life event after the other not really appreciating the everyday events. For example, I couldn't wait to graduate from high school, but missed it after I left. I couldn't wait to plan a wedding and get married to Travis, but after it was done I wondered what was next. I couldn't wait to graduate college and get a "real" job, but after it was done and I got the job I wished I was back and could take advantage of the learning opportunities I had there. I couldn't wait to move into a house and be back in Lansing, but when it was over I wished that we had spent more time looking at different houses. And then, I couldn't wait to be pregnant, after I was I questioned our readiness to be parents wondering if I really rushed it and pushed Travis too hard.

The first months I was anxious to be "big" so that people would know that I was pregnant. Then I was anxious to hear the baby's heartbeat to know that there was a baby in there. Next, it was the movement. Now, I can't wait to have the baby in my arms, to look into his eyes, to feed him and raise him. But I'm forgetting that I already have the baby. The baby is with me 24/7. How easy is that?

If I continue to live my life by one big life event after the other, I'll continue to miss the importance of the every day stuff. The times Trav and I spend together reading and talking. The times when we hang out with our small group and friends at Riverview. The times when I get to see family and friends back in Saginaw. You get the picture...

So I technically have 2 wks left of pregnancy. It could be tomorrow or 3 wks from now, it shouldn't matter. I should enjoy where I'm at and enjoy what God has given me now otherwise, I'll miss out on a whole lot.

It's A Girl!

2005-08-03T14:41:00.000-04:00

Nope not me, not yet!

My sister in law Emily had her baby Monday at 11:45am (something like that) 7lbs 14oz. She's doing well along with the rest of the family : )

Yeah!!

They've Disappeared...

2005-07-26T12:46:00.000-04:00

I look down one day and to my surprise, my toes have vanished, not to mention my ankles and feet have followed suit.

Seven weeks left...crazy, just crazy.

I love being pregnant; having the baby with me all the time, Travis holding my belly and talking to our little one, Rachael coming up to me bending down and saying "Hello Baby" just to make sure that when the baby is born he'll recognize her voice, feeling the baby move constantly and thus shaking my belly to where I think that I've got a bouncie ball in there that's never heard of the word stop, spending time relaxing and just concentrating on the baby and birth.

But I'm getting anxious to see who's nose the baby has, hoping that it's Trav's that won out. Wondering if it's a boy or a girl to put all the guessing to rest. And just to touch and hold the baby and look into his eyes and tell him how much I love him............and......maybe I'll see my toes again : )

God is so amazing!

Larger and Larger

2005-06-29T11:55:00.000-04:00

So the baby is getting big enough to kick me in my left and right side (at the same time) and in my ribs. He's** constantly moving, taking breaks only when I'm being active. So that ultimately means when I'm sitting, laying, or sleeping, he's on the jungle gym. Actually, I think he perfers the teeter-totter as his playground equipment of choice.

I had a chance to feel his foot one day when he was kicking me in the ribs.....it's just amazing!

I'm at 29wks and getting anxious. Feeling pretty good, though I've had a few days where I've been really sleepy and kinda sick. The heat doesn't help much, but since we have an air conditioning unit in our living room window, that's where I spend most of my time after I get out of work. I have enjoyed a few opportunities to go swimming at IM West at MSU. I think the baby really enjoyed it too : )

Travis has been an extremely big help making sure I'm eating the right things by cooking dinner and doing the grocery shopping. He's also working on a website for our baby registry stuff. He's not totally finished with it yet, but you can view it at www.babyregistry.tlblog.com

My due date, September 13th. My sister is having her baby on September 16th and my sister in law, she is due August 9th. Busy summer : )

Happenings II

2005-05-26T12:28:00.000-04:00

I have to make it quick cause I'm on lunch break........

I'm at 24wks.

A couple days ago I was walking toward the office printer and the baby kicked so hard I actually stopped in my tracks and had to take a breath. Initially he** was on a schedule, where I knew that at 9am he would start kicking me, however, now it varies. He kicks, on some days, the whole day and others he's pretty quiet.

The baby's wardrobe is almost finished. We've been garage sale shopping these past few weeks and have spent alot of money, but have gotten some really nice stuff.

I'm big enough now that I don't fit into any of my pants, except the ones that have been lent to me or the two pairs of maternity jeans that I bought. My T-shirts are tight around my belly, but they still fit : )

**Disclaimer II** It's by the majority of people that I relinquish the use of "her" in most of my statements. One may pop up now and again.....for my sake. It seems that for the most part, the consensus is that I'm having a boy. But we shall see : ) : )

Boy or Girl? What do you think?

Happenings

2005-04-17T18:29:00.000-04:00

We were sitting in church this past Saturday night and while Noel was preaching, I felt a little poke. Then I felt two more. I leaned over to Trav and told him that the baby was moving. He asked me where and put his hand on the spot. I felt the baby again and not saying anything looked at Trav. "Was that it?" He asked me. Yup. The baby did it again and Trav smiled big and said, "That was another one, wasn't it."

And as I am typing this post, the baby is moving. I don't think she* likes the laptop sitting on top of her.

**Disclaimer**
I say a she, because for the first 4 1/2 months I called the baby a he, now I'm saying she. We haven't found out the sex of the baby yet and we won't know until sometime in September. So everyone that's wondering......we're in the same boat.

Stethoscope

2005-04-06T12:32:00.000-04:00

I've been wanting to hear the babys heartbeat again, just to verify that I did indeed hear it the last time I went in to see the midwife.

Last night, I finally heard the baby with the help of my mom's old stethoscope from work. I say finally, because ever since easter when I brought the stethoscope home, every night I would lay on the couch and try and listen. To my dismay I would only hear the gurrgling of my own stomach, until yesterday. It was awesome. I called Trav into the living room, to make sure I wasn't hearing something else. Sure enough, Trav heard it too : ) I believe it was an answer to prayer, because I've been struggling so much with not knowing.

17wks...

Baby Registry

2005-04-03T12:06:00.000-04:00

Hi Everyone! I'm at the 17wk point and feeling the baby every once and awhile. It's crazy to think that I'm almost half way through the pregnancy already.

I'm posting a link to our online registry for those who are interested. We'll also be registering at Toys R Us and possibly Target.

http://www.findgift.com/cgi-local/Registry.cgi/babybrack

Claustrophobic

2005-03-24T03:18:00.000-05:00

I can't sleep....

I never realized how claustrophobic I was until the past few times that I've had a cold, this time being the worst(it doesn't really help that I'm pregnant and my body is creating additional "stuff"). It's not like I can't breath...I just can't breath to the opitmum level that God designed for it to be, BOTH nostrils that allow air to pass through to the lungs in an easy manner. Not having both passages clear makes me feel like someone is putting a pillow on top of my face that I can't get away from. I get panicky, especially at night when I'm trying to sleep, and it doesn't help when my ears are plugged too.

I used to play hide and seek when I was younger and was really good at it. I could fit into the smallest of places. I was really tiny then, short and skinny for my age. I would curl up in a ball and hide in laundry baskets with clothes piled on top of me, in boxes, under beds, in my parents hallway closet where they would put towels and such (I would hide on the bottom shelf with the closet door mostly closed). I tried to play, later in life, with my younger cousins but found that I couldn't stay in my hiding place longer than 2 seconds if it involved things on top of me or somewhere where I felt that my "escape" would be inhibited. Even now, I can't have any blankets on top of my head.

I'm not even sure how or why I got this phobia.

It's about 4:00am on what now is a Thursday morning. I have to get up in 2.5 hrs for work. Now that sitting up has helped "cleared" my nose to some extent, I should try to go back to bed.....at least I have only a half day today and Friday off : )

FIRE

2005-03-20T18:50:00.000-05:00

Our smoke alarms work.

Plastic burns when left on top of the stove when the wrong burner is inadvertantly turned on.

A pampered chef pan works great to transfer the melted mess, too bad it had holes in the bottom.

A sink full of water works when putting out fires.

Our fire extinguisher is still in its box.

All because I wanted a nice large mug of hot tea to sooth my scratchy throat.

150...

2005-03-10T19:39:00.000-05:00

Travis and I heard the baby's heart beat for the first time today. Since the day I looked at the two marks on the pregnancy test until this 13th week, I wondered if there really was a baby in there. I haven't had morning sickness and have been feeling pretty good, but not feeling pregnant at all. I was starting to wonder if my mind and body was playing tricks on me, since I wanted to have a baby so bad. But today confirmed it. Yes I'm pregnant, and in 27 more weeks we'll be holding the baby in our arms.

A Gift...

2005-03-03T18:11:00.000-05:00

I married him when I was 21 and he was only 19. We grew up in the same town, in the same high school, and our houses were only a few miles apart. The relationship started with a question, not from him nor from me. It was a friend of mine that heard that I didn't have a date to my senior homecoming dance. She knew him, so she asked me if I would like to go with him. I had only met him once before back in 8th grade during a church retreat and it was only his face and name that I remembered. I said "Sure, why not." It was during lunch time when she asked him. He sat at the table right next to me for that year and the past years playing Euchre with his friends. She walked over to him and asked if he would like to go with me. "Sure," he said. We went. He was uncomfortable. I just wanted to dance with all my other guy friends. I was not a very nice date, but he was patient.

We continued to date. It was 2yrs later that we agreed it was time to get married. We were married in December of 2000. Since then, it's been hard trying to understand what each other is feeling. It's been tough leaving my family, especially because the relationship between my mom and I has changed. But who Travis is and how much he loves me, means more to me than all the times where it's been hard.

He does things that are so caring and unselfish: When he stays in bed with me all day long, reads to me, makes me ginger and lemon tea, gets me whatever I need because I'm so sick with the flu. When he stays up past 3am working on the coolest website for me -- remembering which photograph is my favorite. When he leaves me notes on the mirror in the bathroom with soap when I get up at 6:15am for work. When he packs my lunch. When he recognizes that I'm having a bad day, he gives me a hug.

He has shown me so many things and has helped me understand how to love, how to really be there for someone even though there are times when they are not being very loving in return.

He's been one of God's great gifts to me...

Hello

2005-02-21T22:22:00.000-05:00