Last Day...

So today is my last day at work and somehow it seems that I should be really excited and happy, but truth is I'm not.

I've always enjoyed doing what I do, being a road designer (Civil Engineer) for MDOT. But the pull of not having to get up at 6:30am every morning after getting maybe 6 hours of interrupted sleep, not having to sit in an freezer of a bathroom and pump two times a day hoping that I get enough milk for Barend to drink that next day, not feeling badly at work that my mind is elsewhere (home with my husband and baby), and not constantly feeling that I'm hard to work with because of my pumping schedule and not wanting to work so much overtime, is too great.

But the person that I love the most....the person that I'm able to say anything to and know that he'll be there for me (even though there are times that I hurt him sooo very much)...the person that I really can't live without...isn't happy. How can I be happy knowing that I'm taking an opportunity away from him, doing something that is looked upon as uncommon, but something that makes him soo happy??

Yeah, I'm looking forward to being home with Barend, being able to sleep when he sleeps, being able to clean and enjoy cleaning (sounds weird I know, but I've always enjoyed cleaning), preparing meals for Trav, not having to pump, and going to parks and museums. But I'm not looking forward to trying to sell our house, Trav commuting, moving, and establishing new relationships with people when I'm not such a good communicator.

Struggles of a working mom, soon to be stay at home mom, trying to balance lifes needs, wants and dreams.

Help...

My in laws came down yesterday to help get the house ready to sell. We got so much done it was incredible. I almost cried this morning going downstairs in the basement, because it was clean. I could see the carpet. Things were organized in boxes. Laundry done and folded. Floors swept. Amazing!

We even brought down the king sized matress from the 2nd floor, a feat in itself.

Thank you guys!!! Love you lots!

Oh, I forgot to mention that our house is 1,100 sft (not including 750 sft in the basement).

Times a Changing....

Yeah, so the rollercoaster that I've been on the past week or so has finally slowed. I don't think it's finished yet, but who knows really.

I can talk about this now because our parents know and my boss knows.

Trav, Barend, and I are moving to Kalamazoo. Travis got a job working with his brother at a computer software company. We're switching rolls. I'll be staying at home with Barend and Trav will be working.

You know you can say so many things all eloquently in your head, but then you try to type them and you just come up short. Yeah, so it sucks leaving friends and a familiar area..........but it's exciting to do something new.

If anyone is looking to buy a home, we're selling ours.
3 bedroom, 1.5 bath, Cape Cod with full basement
Lot size 66' x 280', 6' x 8' shed in backyard
two houses down from a park
Big garden in full bloom
Great neighbors
If your interested, comment below and I'll send you more info : )

More to come soon....oh here is a picture of my silly 'ol bear