Picture...

OK so far I have one picture on the computer of Juniper. She looks so much like her brother when he was born.

Announcing...

Our little bundle of joy has arrived :)

Juniper Lily Ammeline December Brack (we just liked them all)
7lbs 2oz - 19 1/2 inches long
born at 11:47am on May 3, 2008 at home in the water

I'll post some pictures when I get them and our story when I get another minute :)

I've Forgotten...

What I look like not pregnant. 6wks away from the arrival of our second little one and I have to say I'm much bigger than what I was with Barend. Sleeping isn't relaxing...I have to shift positions every couple hours so my hips can have a break. Getting up off the floor....a challenge. Carrying Barend uphill when he begs, "hold you!!"...also a challenge.

Getting excited to see the little one.

Barend is 2.5yrs old now. He's talking up a storm, riding his tricycle, still playing with tools and digging in the dirt, loves to chase the chickens like Grandpa, and play "waterfall" with daddy.

Picture of Barend with his Aunt Shara and Uncle Chad and cousins Elizabeth, Natalie, and Adalia.

News...

So...much has happened since the last time I wrote.

Barend has turned two : ) Adorable as ever. He has his own tool set now and goes around "fixing" the house.

Our house has a sale pending on it. We should be closing any day now, just waiting for the buyers to establish home owners insurance. Big Blessing!!

And....we'll be expecting our next little one sometime mid May. Surprise, for us too : )

Thanks to everyone who's been praying about the house!!!

Names...

Barend called me "Shaaaa.....naaa..." this morning. So weird to hear my name from Barend instead of mama.

Gardening...

Barend has been enjoying life here in the middle of nowhere. Today, we were weeding the garden and while I was trying to explain the difference between a weed and a plant to him, he was trying to "plant" me by continually putting dirt on my back. My little helper : )

Apple...

which has nothing to do with my post, but Barend (my son) just came up to me and said Apple and took the apple core that I had sitting on the computer desk and went to join his dad, sitting on his lap watching him play video games and laughing at all the little people on the TV screen.

It's been awhile for posts with much substance...so much has happened these past few months that's its really hard to put it all into words.

Please pray for some friends of mine as well as my family! Two friends of mine, they lost their babies one at 6months of pregnancy and the other at 7, and then another one of my friends mother in law has stage 4 brain cancer and then my aunt has stage 4 bone cancer. Yuck!!

We're still in Kazoo and our house is still unsold in Lansing. We've lowered the price to 102,900 (so any takers??). I'm not sure what to think of it...feeling somewhat torn between two places, unable to settle. I've got friends that I miss greatly in Lansing....and family here (Kazoo) that I would miss if we left. I know my mom would prefer us in Lansing (easier drive for her). I just wish God would write our story in a book. Tell us where we need to be, when, and how, so all this back and forth stuff would end.

Barends been on a decent schedule when his teeth aren't bothering him. He sleeps for three hours straight, wakes up, nurses for a minute, and goes back to sleep. The cycle repeats until 8 or 9am when he decides its time to wake up for the day. It's been a blessing knowing that Trav and I have some alone time after we put munchkin down. He's extremely active. Following his grandpa everywhere and mimics what he does. "Hammers" nails into the wood using sticks or rocks, of which he has a great assortment as he walks into the house ; ) Wants to constantly ride the tractor, be outside in the dirt (rolling around in it), help grandma "weed" the flower beds pulling up some of the flowers (hasn't learned the distinction between them yet). Basically, whatever you are doing whether it be washing the dishes, cooking, yard work, he wants to help.

Favorite words: rock, stick, poopoo, tractor, dirt, berries, eggs, toast, book, daaadeee, mama, cole (uncle Cole, Travs brother), grandma (both used for Travs parents), juice, fries, cook, bath, gosh (Trav taught him that one), horse, house, truck, car...just to name a few. His run is like a scamper....adorable...a must see. Growing very tall...he's outgrown some of his 18month stuff and into his 2yr clothes (can it really be?) He has similar personality characteristics that match mine when he's tired. He'll get all happy, giggly, and then he gets kinda weird....then starts headbutting, biting (gets frustrated at things easier). So if I don't get him down soon enough, watch out! He's just changing so fast...still cute as ever : )

My sister in laws are both expecting! Emily (Coles wife) is due in October with their third and LaShara (Trav and Coles sister) is due in November with their first. Very excited...Sharas pregnancy is a major answer in prayer. They have been trying for 1.5yrs. Two more babies...added to the few others that I know that are on their way (Nicole in December, my cousin Nicole due in August)

Me, well, I'm still enjoying being a stay at home mom, although I miss the work that I did with MDOT and the people there. I also really miss Lansing every time we go back to check on the house....it's really hard, cause I love being able to take Barend outside on my inlaws 10acre yard and let him roam and discover, without fear of cars and traffic...I enjoy the noises around here, the frogs, birds, whereas you hear the noise of sirens and boom boxes outside our living room window in Lansing...Here I can take Barend up to see his grandparents most anytime.....but I miss our family in Lansing...friendships that have been developed since we moved there back when Trav and I attended MSU.

Faith that God has us in this present position for a purpose and that he will provide understanding and contentment with what he's given us and Hope that he will continue to help us grow and learn in love and compassion for each other and others.

So, Barend has placed the somewhat eaten apple core back on the desk and is currently laughing his head off at a toy bird house that his dad is making a bird pop out of....i guess i should get going!

Jammin...

Trav got me an iPod for Christmas and Barend has already claimed it for himself : )

Christmas Wish...

I wish that Barend would sleep through the night, or at least sleep 4hrs before he wakes up again.

Update...

Barend took his first steps two days ago. He took about five toward me. Just adorable. He hasn't done it again since, but every now and again you'll see him let go of the wall, a chair, or whatever he's holding to stabalize himself and take a small step forward to the next object of his attention. Still working on getting more teeth...not too fun, but he's still adorable.

Kazoo is beautiful, but sometimes lonely. We're here now, mostly moved in to our cozy little apartment downstairs of Travs parents house. We've been back to Lansing a few times to get Christmas decorations and a few odds n ends that we forgot. Oh, and to get the house "cleaned" for a showing we had yesterday. Not even going to say how it went, because I never know. Only God really knows when we're going to sell, however frustrating that may be. The snow may become an issue, due to the steepness of the driveways. I'll have to take some pictures : ) We are only a minute away from a ski slope, so if you want to come and visit we'll have to go skiing if we can get out of the drive.

I don't get a chance to get on the computer anymore. We have dial up now (no cable out here) and only one phone line, so I don't like tying it up more than I have to. My cell phone doesn't work out here unless I go outside and stand in one place or I drive closer to the expressway. You can call it and leave a message. I check them periodically.

Miss you back in Lansing! Thanks to Nicole and Chaz for checking up on the house now and again and getting our mail : )

Gotta go....got some other stuff to do before kiddo wakes up : )

Come and visit sometime!!

Discouragement...

Have you ever been so discouraged by something that it totally drags you down? We're still waiting on selling our house. It seems that were only getting one showing a month. My inlaws on the other hand just listed their house in Freeland 3 wks ago and they have an offer already. It's cool that they are on the verge of moving, but at the same time I'm jealous. They've offered us a place in their house, but the fear of imposing is there.

Although, it seems that I shouldn't be complaining. There are others like us, trying to sell their house and many on the market much longer than we have been. I guess what I'm asking for is prayer that God would ease my impatient heart. That he would provide the right buyer and that he would provide Trav and I a nudge in the right direction.

They made it...

Tigers are going to the World Series!!! Awesome : )

Change...

I can't believe it's been a month since I left my job. We (Trav, Barend, and I) are still in the process of transitioning. For the past 3wks, I've been able to sleep when Barend sleeps and that's made all the difference. He's on a late night schedule (going to bed at 11:30pm), which I don't really mind too much, but getting up at 10:30am is sometimes frustrating, but I'm not complaining : ) He only woke up once (for the 1st time since he was born) during the night last night. I couldn't believe it : )

Since I've been home with him time doesn't really exist. It's gone by so fast and the days just blend in together.

He is also a year old now. We had a party for him on Saturday which turned out to be a blast : ) Barend didn't "dig in" to his birthday cake as much as I thought he would. He, very meticulously, picked off one of the mini oreo cookies I had used as the froggie's eye and proceeded to eat it. He then went after the other mini oreo and just when I thought he lost interest in the cake, he dragged his fingers across it and got a handful of frosting. Just too cute! He also didn't really take an interest in opening presents, although later the next day when I wanted to put away all the gift bags and tissue paper, he suddenly wanted to explore and find out what was inside them. Barend wanted me to say thanks to everyone who came and for the presents : )

Not walking yet, but getting there. Standing up next to everything and a couple nights ago he was in the middle of the room and stood up on his legs with his hands on the floor. I thought he was going to do it right then, but those silly socks that I put on his feet to keep them warm made him slip and slide and when I went to take them off of him, he lost interest and started playing with his toys.

I'll post some pictures, once I figure out how to download my camera : ) Gotta go!

Last Day...

So today is my last day at work and somehow it seems that I should be really excited and happy, but truth is I'm not.

I've always enjoyed doing what I do, being a road designer (Civil Engineer) for MDOT. But the pull of not having to get up at 6:30am every morning after getting maybe 6 hours of interrupted sleep, not having to sit in an freezer of a bathroom and pump two times a day hoping that I get enough milk for Barend to drink that next day, not feeling badly at work that my mind is elsewhere (home with my husband and baby), and not constantly feeling that I'm hard to work with because of my pumping schedule and not wanting to work so much overtime, is too great.

But the person that I love the most....the person that I'm able to say anything to and know that he'll be there for me (even though there are times that I hurt him sooo very much)...the person that I really can't live without...isn't happy. How can I be happy knowing that I'm taking an opportunity away from him, doing something that is looked upon as uncommon, but something that makes him soo happy??

Yeah, I'm looking forward to being home with Barend, being able to sleep when he sleeps, being able to clean and enjoy cleaning (sounds weird I know, but I've always enjoyed cleaning), preparing meals for Trav, not having to pump, and going to parks and museums. But I'm not looking forward to trying to sell our house, Trav commuting, moving, and establishing new relationships with people when I'm not such a good communicator.

Struggles of a working mom, soon to be stay at home mom, trying to balance lifes needs, wants and dreams.

Help...

My in laws came down yesterday to help get the house ready to sell. We got so much done it was incredible. I almost cried this morning going downstairs in the basement, because it was clean. I could see the carpet. Things were organized in boxes. Laundry done and folded. Floors swept. Amazing!

We even brought down the king sized matress from the 2nd floor, a feat in itself.

Thank you guys!!! Love you lots!

Oh, I forgot to mention that our house is 1,100 sft (not including 750 sft in the basement).

Times a Changing....

Yeah, so the rollercoaster that I've been on the past week or so has finally slowed. I don't think it's finished yet, but who knows really.

I can talk about this now because our parents know and my boss knows.

Trav, Barend, and I are moving to Kalamazoo. Travis got a job working with his brother at a computer software company. We're switching rolls. I'll be staying at home with Barend and Trav will be working.

You know you can say so many things all eloquently in your head, but then you try to type them and you just come up short. Yeah, so it sucks leaving friends and a familiar area..........but it's exciting to do something new.

If anyone is looking to buy a home, we're selling ours.
3 bedroom, 1.5 bath, Cape Cod with full basement
Lot size 66' x 280', 6' x 8' shed in backyard
two houses down from a park
Big garden in full bloom
Great neighbors
If your interested, comment below and I'll send you more info : )

More to come soon....oh here is a picture of my silly 'ol bear

Rollercoaster...

Yes, a rollercoaster, one that is exciting to the point where you bite off all your finger nails in anticipation and also one that is sickening...so many ups and downs and side to sides once you're off the ride you're not sure where your stomach landed.

That's how my life is going right now. One gigantic rollercoaster. I'm not enjoying it.

Sometimes I just wish God would say...this is where you need to be at this point in your life, this is how things should look. Then I can make the necessary decisions to match what the picture is supposed to look like, like the old color by numbers that I did when I was little. Unfortunately, I remember not really following the numbers and wanting it to look my way instead of what the instructions called for. I still wish for some direction....especially when you love someone soooo very much and they desire their lifes picture to be something different then your own. How do you resolve this?!?!?

Yes, I've been praying and so has he and so has a few other people, but how do you know which way to go???

Just sad....just really really sad.....

Commenting...

So I was wondering why I wasn't getting any comments....especially on the pictures of the cutest baby : ) Holly pointed out that I had it set to members only commenting. I changed it to anyone, so feel free to write a note.

Swimming...

Here's my little guy, enjoying his cousin's pool.



Side note: He has 5 teeth!

Trippy....

Just read this in the Lansing State Journal...

"Just after 12:30 a.m. Sunday, a 2001 Chevrolet Cavalier driven by Kevin Mallory, 38, of Owosso was heading east in the westbound lanes of Interstate 69 near Upton Road, Clinton County sheriff's officials said. Mallory's car struck a westbound Chrysler Pacifica driven by Shanna Clark, 28, of Chicago; both drivers died instantly.

A backseat passenger in the westbound car, Travis Clark, 26, of Chicago, also was pronounced dead at the scene. A third passenger, Kerry Putnam, 25, of Chicago, was taken to Sparrow Hospital, where she remained in serious condition Monday." Article Link to LSJ

Notice the names and ages.......only a year older than Trav and I. The driver traveling the wrong way struck their vehicle going 60-70mph. Crazy!